In the last 18 games (since June 18th) he has scored 19 runs and his 28 hits are unsurpassed by anyone on the team.  He’s hit .363 in 77 ABs with 4 HRs and 14 Ribbys.  Is he Evan Longoria? 

No, Evan has actually done better (.383-5-20 in 73 ABs).  Our guy’s the reluctant centerfielder, the thinking man’s ballplayer.  Yup, Carl Crawford has been on fire since returning from his suspension.  Who woulda thunk it, apparently not CC…after all, he doesn’t like to think.

On the other hand, the other centerfielder has been chillin like one of Joe’s chardonnays.  In 70 ABs he’s hitting an even .200 with only 4 ribbys and 1 blast.  He has scored 14 runs however.  But that’s Ruthian compared to the bat of Jonny Gnomes (.047 in 21 ABs).  Talk about shrinkage.  ‘Jonny, grow the long locks back.  Your bats been as potent as George Castanza’s after a swim ever since going to the skinhead look 2 years ago

On the other other hand, Hinske has been rocking along at a .325-2-10 in 43 ABs, and while Gross hasn’t hit much better than Jonny at least he has 6 rbis in his limited plate appearances and there’s a legitimate purpose for him to wear a glove.