OTTOTD 11/20: I'm not dead yet edition
I kind of miss having a job where I could sit around here all day. Not dead yet, though. Enjoy.
CUSTOMER: Here's one -- nine pence.
DEAD PERSON: I'm not dead!
MORTICIAN: What?
CUSTOMER: Nothing -- here's your nine pence.
DEAD PERSON: I'm not dead!
MORTICIAN: Here -- he says he's not dead!
CUSTOMER: Yes, he is.
DEAD PERSON: I'm not!
MORTICIAN: He isn't.
CUSTOMER: Well, he will be soon, he's very ill.
DEAD PERSON: I'm getting better!
CUSTOMER: No, you're not -- you'll be stone dead in a moment.
MORTICIAN: Oh, I can't take him like that -- it's against regulations.
DEAD PERSON: I don't want to go in the cart!
CUSTOMER: Oh, don't be such a baby.
MORTICIAN: I can't take him...
DEAD PERSON: I feel fine!
CUSTOMER: Oh, do us a favor...
MORTICIAN: I can't.
CUSTOMER: Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes? He won't
be long.
MORTICIAN: Naaah, I got to go on to Robinson's -- they've lost nine
today.
CUSTOMER: Well, when is your next round?
MORTICIAN: Thursday.
DEAD PERSON: I think I'll go for a walk.
CUSTOMER: You're not fooling anyone y'know. Look, isn't there
something you can do?
DEAD PERSON: I feel happy... I feel happy.
[whop]
CUSTOMER: Ah, thanks very much.
MORTICIAN: Not at all. See you on Thursday.
0 recs |
221 comments
Comments
HE'S A WITCH
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 9:05 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
The League continues to surprise me everyweek.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:21 AM EST reply actions 0 recs
Good one last night?
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 9:23 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Yes.
The fantasy football references were as bleh as usual, but there was one extended sequence that was absolutely hilarious and most of the banter was fantastic.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:25 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
As I've said before, the group of friends I watch Sunny with couldn't give two shits about football, yet every week the show has them laughing.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:26 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
The banter is muy excellente
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 9:27 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Best Top Gun reference ever? Best Top Gun reference ever.
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:30 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Had me dying.
All that was missing was the ice.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:32 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Antonio Gates is a beautiful man naked
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:30 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Oh, hey, man, I wasn't expecting to see you.
Maybe that’s because you stole all my shit.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:32 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Dude, this sleep bong is awesome
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:33 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Just so you know this is the exact jacket that Vin Diesel wore in XXX
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 9:54 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Right in the Clijsters
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 10:19 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Cookies for breakfast?!?!?!?!
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:34 AM EST reply actions 0 recs
I've broken her down! She's vulnerable! Now she thinks she has the HIV!
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:38 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Buckle up buttercup, you're in for a good old western-grip style handjob
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 9:40 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
My grandmother had an affair with Susan B. Anthony.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:42 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
My grandmother was a lesbian
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:42 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Btw, same chick as the old lady who played piano for The Nightman Cometh?
I knew Calvin Coolidge… Calvin Coolidge was a friend of mine…
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:43 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah "Gladys"
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:44 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Question: the classical music sequence when Dennis is thinking... Boondocks Saints reference?
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:41 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I fucking hope not. I don't remember Boondock Saints too well, but I doubt they used any Aria's from Carmen.
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:42 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I mean, I broke into her apartment, I did some plumbing, I had a bag of hair...
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 9:44 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Which brings us to the 2nd 'n' Neglect Her Emotionally
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:44 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Not enough Charlie in this episode for me. Also, I like that every episode now ends in screaming
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:47 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Haha, Google's new OS is a website?!?!?!
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:46 AM EST reply actions 0 recs
It's a browser window with native apps (like google docs etc) that runs on a linux kernal. It's supposed to be netbook/smartphone only
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:48 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
But how will I torrent illegal content on that?
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 10:12 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
It's a browser.
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 10:12 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Vince Naimoli's new tell-all book where he tries to take credit for building a dynasty is only $24.99
Personally, I love this quote:
“I’m a hard-hitter,” Naimoli writes, “but I think I’m good-hearted, kind of like Clint Eastwood’s movie characters.”
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 9:47 AM EST reply actions 0 recs
More like Pinch Bungholey, amirite?
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 9:48 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Urine Animal
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 3:21 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Did he tell the asian players to get off his lawn?
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 10:13 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I know a lot of people on here read The Sports Guy, and he may or may not visit the site
so here is his latest column in which he disagrees with Belichick’s call. Would love to see the opinions on this.
Signature space available for rent - Got to pay the bills somehow
by Buc Wild on Nov 20, 2009 10:20 AM EST reply actions 0 recs
Better points than most
At least he has respect for probabilities. The valid argument against going for it is that if you put a large portion fo your eggs into one play. Its not a best of 7on 4th and 2s. If you fail, there is a huge shift in the odds.
Sort of like in poker when two players are all after the flop. Normally there are two more cards to determine the winner of ther hand. Ins ome cash games, the final two cards on the board may be run twice meaning there are 3 different scenarios. The favorite could win both, they coudl split the pot, or the dog could win twice. Because its run twice, the favorite is far less likely to lose the pot, but he is not as likely to win the whole pot sinc ethe dog has too chances to suck out on him.
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 10:41 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I still think he made the right call
Punting was the safer route or hedge, though expected outcome was greatest by going for it. Also sorry for all the typos above. Need caffeine.
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 10:44 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
He has some valid points, but relating to a two point conversion is not entirely accurate
He references probabilities and then says the league average is 55% and says that in this situation there is no way its 55%. He talks about home field, the crowd etc but never once mentions New England’s offense is better than league average. Do they cancel each other out? Don’t know, but you can’t just look at one side of the equation, build it up and never acknowledge the other half of the argument.
Signature space available for rent - Got to pay the bills somehow
by Buc Wild on Nov 20, 2009 10:52 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Some people would argue that that's the only way to argue.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 10:56 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Sure
Biggest difference is the tight space with which to operate on a 2 pt conversion. Back of the end zone is an extra barrier to success and clutters the play.
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 11:07 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
My brother reported on his podcast earlier this week he was a complete bitch about the call and sounded petty and pathetic.
I’m probably done with Simmons in regards to NFL. Not that his NFL shit was every great, but it was occasionally funny.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 11:13 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I can't read anyone that looks down their nose at baseball as hard as Simmons does
His “jokes” remind me of when you catch the beginning of Seinfeld and Jerry is doing his routine from 1989.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:17 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Pretty much.
I love his basketball stuff, even though he’s wrong half the time, and most of his podcasts (aside from the one’s with Cousin Sal and John O’Connell) are entertaining. But, his baseball columns are absolutely dreadful. Partly because of his stupid Boston complex where they bitch and moan about their teams just because they aren’t perfect, mostly because he refuses to acknowledge advanced metrics.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 11:23 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I really wanted him to be a GM and fail.
Like miserable fail. Like worse than Isiah
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 11:24 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
like worse than RJ weaving classical lit references into DRB articles?
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:29 AM EST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
I wanted him to fail so hard it's like FreeZo falling for Ashley hard.
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 11:29 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Don't lose perspective
I said he could be the backup someday. Goldstein agrees.
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 11:45 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Hellicksonstine agrees
nuff said
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:46 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
It ain't trickin if you got it.
by R.J. Anderson on Nov 20, 2009 12:33 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
In your case it's trickin
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 1:15 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I only watched the first half last night
Pretty entertaining game, though I can’t stand Noah, and the Bulls offense can be characterized as panic-and-pass. Rose looked awful, my guess is his hair ends up pretty long.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:31 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Rose had an ankle injury I am pretty sure is still bothering him.
Bulls offense is god awful. Noah is a great energy player he just needs to not shoot it sometimes, great rebounder though. I can’t stand Vinny Del Coach-o but so is life. Salmons finally made some shots. I’m down with resting Rose still he gets healthier.
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 11:33 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Kirk Hinrich makes 10M a year to ride the pine, trade that man to the Mag
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:35 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm sorry Captain Kirk is untradeable because I am pretty sure our owner loves him to death.
Expect #12 to be retired.
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 11:36 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
He likes BPro and thinks Will Carroll is good.
That lets you know everything you need to about his baseball acumen.
by R.J. Anderson on Nov 20, 2009 12:24 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Henry wants a replay.
Further proof that he is the greatest athlete in sports historah. CLASSY AND CLEAN SHAVEN.
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:28 AM EST via mobile reply actions 0 recs
Yeah he wants it since they can't go back and change what has already happened in which his team won.
Dirty cheap French bastard
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 11:29 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
The Irish are being super hypocrites about the whole thing considering they beat Georgie in a qualifier a while back thanks to a Robbie Keane handball.
Not to mention Robbie handballed it four separate times against France. That said, it is the World Cup and it has massive implications, particularly for Ireland, who’s economy is once again complete shit.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 11:30 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Apparently it's the Super Bowl of the world*
- According to ESPN everything must be a football-derivative.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:32 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Henry...he's like the black Jeter!
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:35 AM EST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
Their defense is at about the same level
HIYO
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:36 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
"Asking Henry to play defense is like asking Tom Brady to line up at nose tackle, Greenie."
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:38 AM EST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
THIS ROBBIE KEANE GUY IS AN ASSOCIATION FOOTBALL PLAYER, GUYS.
MY NAME FOR HIM IS THE FIDDLER.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 11:41 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I wish I could rec something from my phone.
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:43 AM EST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
But FIFA is even worse than the US sports media when it comes to breaking with tradition.
It would be nice to see the FFF at least offer a replay, to save face. It was an awful end to a great two leg tie. Henry was offsides on the free kick, and Billy G was offside for the goal. The whole play was a clusterfuck.
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:34 AM EST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
How many little Leprechauns killed themselves because of the result of a soccer match?
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 11:36 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I imagine there was some drunken fisticuffs
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:36 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
In a shocking twist of events, the worst Irish riot at the national level was instigated by the English when the Republic beat the Three Lions back in... 96?
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 11:38 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Good a few less soccer fans in the world
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 11:38 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Did some Everton fan own you in MW2 recently?
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:40 AM EST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
Supposing a replay doesn't happen, they absolutely have to institute instant replay for the World Cup.
Only on goals, obviously you can’t use it to slow down every other play, but just run instant replay on goals so this kind of thing doesn’t happen, as well as double checking whether the ball crossed the line, et cetera.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 11:39 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
How hard is it for every sport to have a dude in a booth who watches every replay then just radios in to the guy on the
field what happened?
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 11:40 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Laser grid from post to post and a sensor in the ball.
I believe Arsene was arguing for this a year or two ago.
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:41 AM EST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
That was nice of him to take a break from molesting children to put forth a productive idea.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 11:42 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
FTW
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:43 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Those kids are grateful for every wrinkly caress.
He’s making them better lovers!
Mira Sorvino...Paul Walker...T-Pain...Fall 2010...HEADSTONE MAFIA, A LOVE STORY OF REVENGE. "5/5 stars!!!" - DRB User "Andy Hellicksonstine"
by PlayOnWords on Nov 20, 2009 11:46 AM EST via mobile up reply actions 0 recs
Yay
I know my team Cubby and ray fan….Im not a 1/2 and 1/2 fan…im a RAYS FAN…and with that comes knowledge of my team, and their personas. Carlos Pena is the best first baseman in baseball…Period. Ive seen him catch stuff that made me question if he had a cape on! CC…also Loves being in Tampa bay…..as well as Carlos does. He did mention he was up for negotiotions for a long contrct…if the Organisation will discuss it wioth him. Hey another thing about Pena….without him….there will be no one to show an example. He has the best attitude around. I dont know a better player or kinder person…as well as one of the hardest working guys. His approach to the game(and life) is something i wish i could be more like. Im proud to have him wear the Rays uniform. Even without how well he obviously is
Why do you kill threads????
by Some other guy who does not care on Nov 20, 2009 11:42 AM EST reply actions 0 recs
Trade crawford for a catcher
Trading Crawford for a catcher would not be a good thing. There’s simply no catcher alive that would be a good enough trade for CC. The Rays are trying to identify this franchise, to put a face on it. One of the biggest steps to doing that is by having atleast one player who has played his entire career here, right now Crawford’s that man! Next up, Longoria, after that Shields and Price. Keep CC and sign Zaun back, problem solved.
Why do you kill threads????
by Some other guy who does not care on Nov 20, 2009 11:43 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
If Pena will play for 3M a year, he can stay.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 11:45 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
If only he could play
catcher
Why do you kill threads????
by Some other guy who does not care on Nov 20, 2009 11:47 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm not sure what the problem is with this post. I would have put it a bit more eloquently, but I pretty much agree with what's being said.
I can't wait until we trade him for a reliever.
by kericr on Nov 20, 2009 12:18 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
THIS REALLY MADE ME LOL'N HARD
rayswin626Posts:768
Mark Cuban still wants to own a baseball team. The Cubs turned him down. Now rumor is he’s sniffing around the Dodgers Frank McCourt 3 ring circus…. But what about Tampa Bay?? Cuban would own a team in the most glamorous Division in baseball (AL East). He would own a talented, young, scrappy team that likes putting their fingers in the eyes of the Red Sox and Yankees. Cuban may conclude that the Rays are a money pit. No matter how much money he sinks into the Rays he knows the Yankees and Red Sox would spend more… But Cuban could probably buy out Sternberg and partners a helluva lot cheaper than the LA Dodgers or Chicago Cubs….
Obviously Stuey should be playing at the 10 and 20 table and not with the wiseguys… Cuban has resources to lock-up CC. To lock-up Carlos. and Jason and Zoby and Matt and whomever he wants to keep. Isn’t that all we are asking as Rays fans??? We don’t want a $ 200 million payroll. We want ownership that has skin in the game that gets his rocks off taunting the lion in the cage . ( Yankees and Red Sox)….. Not one who lives in the Northeast and complains to Yankee and Red Sox fans how lousy the Tampa Bay sports market is…
Rays lose
Why do you kill threads????
by Some other guy who does not care on Nov 20, 2009 11:56 AM EST reply actions 0 recs
Not that I buy this or advocate this, but what would the general reaction be to deeper pockets taking over the Rays?
Signature space available for rent - Got to pay the bills somehow
by Buc Wild on Nov 20, 2009 12:02 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I'd be down
mostly if they kept Friedman and crew running the show. Just Mo Money No Problems
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 12:03 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Not sure.
It depends on if Cuban goes in knowing there’s absolutely no chance he’ll recoup 100% of his investment, and if he actually understands the potential scope of loss. If he dumps 150, 200m into payroll, he’ll likely be losing 50-60m a year.
I don’t really think deeper pockets is the answer, I’m pretty sure Sternberg’s pockets are plenty deep enough, but I’m also sure that he can’t afford to go Huyzengia and just pour millions down the drain just to win a championship.
We need to get out of the mindset of trying to figure out how to compete with the Yankees’ payroll. NOBODY competes with their payroll, the number 2 spending team (the Mets) spent nearly $70 million less then them last year. This team needs to figure out how to consistently afford to spend $90-$100m a year, which puts them in the top 15. If they can’t compete on that, they can’t compete.
I can't wait until we trade him for a reliever.
by kericr on Nov 20, 2009 12:12 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Donald Brown for 2010 is all mine!
CUrrently on a 24/300 unit contract. Will be 34 on a 2 yr deal if opt for that route.
To Ronnie Browns RB depleted owner for the cost of Justin Forsett and Lance Moore
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 12:00 PM EST reply actions 0 recs
WTF are you babbling about?
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 12:23 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
A Fantasy Trade Deadline Steal that has me oh so giddy
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 12:31 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I'd rather hear of Nevin Ashley than this.
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 12:33 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Not enough food or video games for SRQ to pay attention to in this thread.
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 12:37 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm still waiting for the depth of the texting with accounting girl
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 12:57 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
If I read this right, you just locked up a decent guy in a great system for waiver wire material
I have no idea on the relativity of that pricing, who are similar contracted players?
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 12:38 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Open Market RBs from 2009 Auction
(Remember its a diluted pool due to existing contracts)
Reggie Bush 26
Gore 95
LJ 45
J-Stew 22
McFadden 45
LT 72
Knowshon 34
McCoy 22
Beanie 40
Rice 30
Shonn greene 24
Felix 18
Add 10 to these players #’s to keep next year with future right sof extension. Add 5 if you want to keep for one fianl year in 2010.
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 12:56 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Oh yea Westbrook 84 is another one
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 12:57 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Pretty interesting league, I've never played auction before
I like the penalty/price you have to pay for your keepers. Pretty slick move if Brown can get acclimated to the system.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:12 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
It works like such
You have a 300 unit cap, any player bought at auction or in midseason pickups (you leave cap room for midseason FA bidding) can be released, signed to a 1 yr expiring deal at +5 or a 2 year at +10. In between years 1 and 2 of a 2 year deal you have one final chance to extend the player as many additional years as you want at a cost of 5 units per yr. Once that deal expires he goes back to auction. You can waive any player during the offseason prior to July 31st with no cap penalty regardless of time left on deal.
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 1:23 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Any content requests for Monday morning?
by R.J. Anderson on Nov 20, 2009 1:13 PM EST reply actions 0 recs
NEVIN ASHLEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 1:15 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Barty's offensive breakout compared to similar breakouts by SS's in the past.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:17 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
You and SF1 should get a room
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 1:23 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
zing.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:25 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Yes, thats true, we book every single hotel room
Follow Me on Twitter @FreeZorilla
by FreeZorilla on Nov 20, 2009 1:26 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
An analysis of the upcoming year's salary breakdown?
Sign lady must die.
by EminenceFront on Nov 20, 2009 1:16 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Guest column by Drays Bay user "Suttree"
by Suttree on Nov 20, 2009 1:16 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
If you get started now we can see it some time in May
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 1:17 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, I "go there"
FREE SPEACH is a myth. There is no such thing as 100% free speech. You cannot go into a movie theater and say "FIRE"!…"What? I have freedom of speach!" Bull. Doesnt work that way. Any real lawyer will tell you that.
by Top Gun Numba 1 on Nov 20, 2009 1:20 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Do a piece on what would have been with Greg Norton
I can't wait until we trade him for a reliever.
by kericr on Nov 20, 2009 1:55 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
KLAW is chatting
http://espn.go.com/sportsnation/chat/_/id/29526/mlb-insider-keith-law
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:16 PM EST reply actions 0 recs
I love this
King (St. Louis)
I am from St. Louis and that is not even the point, the point is is that you voted for a pitcher with a 15-10 record and a higher ERA for the CY Young over a pitcher with a 17-4 record and an ERA of 2.24. Makes absolutely no sense.
Klaw
(1:16 PM)
The point is that won/lost totals are irrelevant. They tell you about run support, bullpen support, and defense, not how the starter pitched. (They tell you all four things, but too much of the first 3 and not enough of the last one.) If you say “17-4” you have lost the argument.
So that is how you talk without being an a-hole. noted
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:22 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
And this
Bill (FL)
Is it possible for the Rays to land a legitimate power closer? Do you think Jacob McGee could be that guy?
Klaw
(1:20 PM)
I don’t see them doing that. Relievers are probably the worst way for a low-payroll team to invest money. Yes, McGee could be that guy if he comes all the way back from TJ.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:26 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Is 17-4 the new 18-1?
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 1:29 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I already posted in the thread.
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 1:34 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Is this a Patriots joke?
On a baseball blog? For shame.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:33 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Scotty Kaz
J.P. (JC)
Wouldn’t a full season of Kazmir account for some of Lackey’s innings, assuming Lackey signs elsewhere? Also, what is your opinion on Kazmir, will he ever be a #1 type pitcher again?
Klaw
(1:33 PM)
I doubt it – more of a mid-rotation guy who flashes better stuff, and probably can’t do 200 innings regularly. I’m probably the low man on Kaz.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:34 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Kitty Kaz. :(
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 1:35 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
He didn't use my question either
Seems like he just wants to defend his Cy Young pick
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 1:59 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
EdLOSE
James (Detroit)
If Edwin Jackson doesn’t get traded, who do you think pitches better for the Tigers next year between him and Porcello?
Klaw
(2:05 PM)
Porcello.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 2:07 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
The hits keep on coming
Phil (Seattle)
Would you rather have Edwin Jackson or Brandon Morrow?
Klaw
(2:12 PM)
I’d rather roll the dice on Morrow. Jackson is what he was in the second half this year and all of 2008, and he’s more expensive.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 2:13 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
The Onion Just Ran a Feature on SRQ.
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/overweight_college_student?utm_source=onion_rss_daily
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 2:07 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
That's mean
rec’d
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 2:09 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
But what do you wear to the beach?
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 2:17 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Who here nabbed the Sunny xmas special?
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 2:13 PM EST reply actions 0 recs
God, I love the AP
But the perception of pitching has changed, with fans and voters now relying more heavily on new-age stats such as WHIP (hits plus walks per inning) and FIP (a designer equation that factors out a team’s defensive ability).
Pitchers have taken notice, too. Greinke talked about his Fielding Independent Pitching after this week’s win and Lincecum pointed to his WHIP.
by vincesucks on Nov 20, 2009 3:17 PM EST reply actions 0 recs
Also
WHO DOESN’T LOVE THE NEW-LOOK ORANGEMEN? #24 Syracuse routed #12 California last night, beating them like a dog with fleas with stifling interior defense and good enough offense. Each starter contributed at both ends in a 95-73 win. Next up is #4 UNC who is coming off a tight beatdown of #15 Ohio State. The games at 7 tonight. Meanwhile, unranked Wake Forest is 3-0 while playing 3 middle school teams and continues to duck the Orange by not agreeing to schedule a meet up. I’d like to say that the Orange will get their chance in the big dance, but this prognosticator has Wake on the outside looking in. Good luck in the NIT tourney at the end of the year Wake Forest.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:32 PM EST reply actions 0 recs
No Big East team has lost a game so far this year.
Even USF, which looks surprisingly good.
by vincesucks on Nov 20, 2009 3:34 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Are you calling user vincesucks a liar?
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:36 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I was clarifying.
One Big East team dropped a game to DII team. Care to remind me?
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:37 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Exhibition games don't count for anything
Jimmy B put himself in halfway through the 2nd half. He knocked down 2 3’s and punched a guy. You won’t find it in the box score because it’s an exhibition game, they don’t even keep one.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:39 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
That was exhibition.
Only conference left undefeated is BE with a 35-0 cumulative record. Speaks for itself.
by vincesucks on Nov 20, 2009 3:39 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Who cares? It's November.
Conference pride is so gay.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:40 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Pretty sure you learned everything that you know about being gay at Wake Forest.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:41 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
If conference pride doesn't matter, why not leave the ACC?
by vincesucks on Nov 20, 2009 3:41 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
What?
That’s retarded. Do you cheer for the Yanks and Sox too? Or do you only ride coattails in college.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:42 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
He's got you there
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:45 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Not really.
Claiming support of another BE member in pre-conference play (where their wins help RPI) is akin to ‘cheering for the Yanks and the Sox’ (in a professional sport where postseason bids are decided on the field) is a logical fallacy at best.
by vincesucks on Nov 21, 2009 11:14 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
All that I have to say at this point is
CUUUUUUUUUUUSEEEEE
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 22, 2009 2:24 AM EST up reply actions 0 recs
They're kind of good
Every damn year, BEast is the best because refs swallow whistles and let them play. ACC is for whiny bitches that can’t bring it.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:40 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
When was the last time a Big East team won it all?
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:40 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
UConn I believe, lets not bring that up
Cuse won it all in what 03?
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:41 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, the melo year
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 3:42 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
That team was sick nasty
Melo, Hakim, Kweth Duany, G-Mac,
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:45 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I loved that team.
Except that queer McNamara.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:45 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
G-Mac will apologize with his dying breath for getting blood on your shirt
THAT MAN IS A GOD
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:46 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I hate white guards. Especially the white trash variety.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:46 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
You're thinking of Erik Devendorf
We saw him at a casino last time I was in Vegas, and no he wasn’t hitting a girl with his car.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:48 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
He's kind of a scum bag and not my favorite player, but you can't deny the heart
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:51 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Well put
I see what you did there
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:53 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I would say that every year the Big East is the best because they have 16 teams in the conference.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:43 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
They also have about 6-9 tourney-quality teams every year.
Officially now the head of the Lobstein bandwagon.
by P Brady on Nov 20, 2009 3:44 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
9? Now you are bullshitting, they are both good, and they may have more top end talent with
the non-graduates spilling out of UNC every year, but the middle of the BEast is far superior.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:47 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Get used to
THIS
you’re going to be hearing about it all year.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:49 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
meh
Depends on the year. Going into conference play I’d say the middle 50% of the ACC is better. After conference play and the officials take the game over, then the Big East teams are probably better. I still maintain that ACC officiating is what kills the ACC come tourney time. That’s why only UNC had had success in recent years (most talent and best coached team in AMerica).
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:49 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Most talent, I don't think best coached
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:51 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I do.
Roy is awesome. He’s a great coach. Total dbag, but the dude gets players and gets ’em to play.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:53 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Watching them last night those two 6'10 brothers are ridiculous
where does he find these guys?
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:54 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
They just got Barnes too.
They got a 5* from Tampa this year. he looks shitty to me though. Too skinny. Maybe in a couple of years he’ll be good.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:56 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Oh, oh wait, uh hang on. Did you see, like uhhh uh, a little... naked dude out on the street anywhere?
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:33 PM EST reply actions 0 recs
Uh yeah, I think he's dead. (the dead frat alien twitches)
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:34 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Are you serious? ... Well, when he wakes up, make him drink.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:34 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Bummed about Wake not playing any real teams?
I feel ya.
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:36 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
We play the Zags next week.
Then we play at Purdue for the ACC/Big Televen challenge.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:36 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Yawn
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:38 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Purdue is a top 10 team and the Zags almost knocked off MSU.
uality competition. We can’t all get Providence, USF, etc. in conference, though.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:39 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Speaking of...
http://madison.craigslist.org/tix/1471862416.html
I'm a Brett Favre honk so FUCK YOU!
by PriceMultiCyYoungs on Nov 20, 2009 3:50 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
lolz
I hate ESPN for sticking us with the best team in the Big 10, and Duke gets effing Wisky.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:52 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Watch that mouth son...
Bo Ryan can coach with the best of em!
I'm a Brett Favre honk so FUCK YOU!
by PriceMultiCyYoungs on Nov 20, 2009 3:52 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
And don't they match them up based on final standings from the year before?
So you have nothing to bitch about. If that is correct.
I'm a Brett Favre honk so FUCK YOU!
by PriceMultiCyYoungs on Nov 20, 2009 3:53 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Nope
ESPN chooses who they want to play.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:54 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Are you positive?
Who cares, I guess. It’s not much of “challenge” anyways. BigTen hoops is awful….same for football.
I'm a Brett Favre honk so FUCK YOU!
by PriceMultiCyYoungs on Nov 20, 2009 3:56 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I'm almost positive.
Last year Wisky finished 6th and Duke finished 2nd. We finished 3rd and Purdue finished 2nd. the Big 10 is decent, but they just have no depth. They always seem to overachieve in the tourney (unlike the ACC).
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:59 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
That's hilarious
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:52 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I don't know what's a bigger victory your beat down of Oral Roberts or your dismantling of High Point
What division is High Point in?
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:37 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Southestern Conference
With Davidson, Richmond, and Elon. Not a bad conference, but they’re awful. Oral upset Stanford, but they stink this year.
by rglass44 on Nov 20, 2009 3:38 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Got our next interview subject lined up.
We name drop him all the time around here.
by R.J. Anderson on Nov 20, 2009 3:45 PM EST reply actions 0 recs
R.J,: Bill can I perform oral sex on you?
B.S.: Yes, but only if you wear this Brady jersey.
by SRQman on Nov 20, 2009 3:47 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Jonah or Chaim?
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:48 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
Chaim was like three weeks ago.
And Jonah’s upcoming, but this is a FO person.
by R.J. Anderson on Nov 20, 2009 3:49 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs
I have no short term memory
I'm not really a NUMBERS guy!!
by Andy Hellicksonstine on Nov 20, 2009 3:53 PM EST up reply actions 0 recs

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