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Around SBN: Bracketology 2012: Duke Finally Steps Up To The No. 1 Line

The following things are better than troy percival:

And now for some basic hard truths from your ol pal HAHAHAH OH WOW:

 

1. Troy Percival shall forever in my posts be referred to as "Multiple gunshot wounds to the lead."

 

2. Troy Percival has somehow managed to fall even lower down the respect ladder. He is now officially worse than:

 

a.  A kick in the groin

b. Pancreatic Cancer

c.Having your clutch go out on your car while on the Howard Franklin on your way to a Rays game where Percy is not available and earned leads are statistically more safe.

d. The Economy

e. Octomom

f. Joe Maddon's various and sundry missions

g. Niemann's fastballs

h. 1997 Edwin Jackson

i. The Bubonic Plague

j. Ishtar the movie.

 

I think that pretty much covers most of what this man is worse than. Thank God this toxic asset's contract is up this year and he can go far away from any lead. He was a great man in his heyday and he helped us out last year, but considering how high expectations are this year, and how our record has been going, putting this man in with anything less than a 4 run lead is Deer Huntert Russian Roullette with 5 bullets and nicky already survived round one. Do you hear that Joe? DITCH PERCY! DIDI MAU! DIDI MAU! DIDI MAU! *slaps face*

This post was written by a member of the DRaysBay community and does not necessarily express the views or opinions of DRaysBay staff.

Comment 44 comments  |  7 recs  | 

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UNTIL NEXT HURF

THE SPORTS DURF

Bumpin' Thumpin' A Bomb Dunkin' Donut Dunkin' Charm School Flunkin'
My pocket says it pays to be me
Exuse me but don't I have the cutest smile you've ever seen?

by HAHAHA OH WOW on May 14, 2009 9:33 AM EDT reply actions  

Hitler

"Where we all wait in earnest with pudding in hand for the Upton comet to sail through the roofed skies, so that we may meet Him."

by kericr on May 14, 2009 9:50 AM EDT reply actions  

Also, sincere rec'd; I like where this is leading

"Where we all wait in earnest with pudding in hand for the Upton comet to sail through the roofed skies, so that we may meet Him."

by kericr on May 14, 2009 9:51 AM EDT up reply actions  

DIAF and take that wailing cow with you

Do what you love to do and give it your very best. Whether it's business or baseball, or the theater, or any field. If you don't love what you're doing and you can't give it your best, get out of it. Life is too short. You'll be an old man before you know it.

-Al Lopez

by Sandy Kazmir on May 14, 2009 3:31 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

/thread

"Where we all wait in earnest with pudding in hand for the Upton comet to sail through the roofed skies, so that we may meet Him."

by kericr on May 14, 2009 3:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

m. Being with Pat Burrell at 4:59 pm in Miami when you're right on the verge of climax

Assuming you’re a woman or really like “Pat’s Bat”

/obscure?

Bumpin' Thumpin' A Bomb Dunkin' Donut Dunkin' Charm School Flunkin'
My pocket says it pays to be me
Exuse me but don't I have the cutest smile you've ever seen?

by HAHAHA OH WOW on May 14, 2009 9:58 AM EDT reply actions  

Do what you want just dont hand the ball to percy

Bumpin' Thumpin' A Bomb Dunkin' Donut Dunkin' Charm School Flunkin'
My pocket says it pays to be me
Exuse me but don't I have the cutest smile you've ever seen?

by HAHAHA OH WOW on May 14, 2009 10:14 AM EDT up reply actions  

ps i meant 2007 edwin jackson

but then i suck my posts suck and you know what i mean

Bumpin' Thumpin' A Bomb Dunkin' Donut Dunkin' Charm School Flunkin'
My pocket says it pays to be me
Exuse me but don't I have the cutest smile you've ever seen?

by HAHAHA OH WOW on May 14, 2009 9:59 AM EDT reply actions  

A list of things I'd rather do than watch Percival pitch

1. Be waterboarded
2. Go to a Carlos Mencia maraton concert
3. Hear another Brett Favre comeback story
4. Go swimming in a septic tank
5. Remarry my ex-wife
6. Watch a looped tape of USF beating UCF 64-12
7. Get a vasectomy w/o anesthesia
8. Have Delmon Young throw a bat at me
9. Have Joe Morgan and Tim McCarver call every game of baseball I watch for the rest of my life
10. Give Naimoli back full control of the Rays

by Jason Collette on May 14, 2009 10:01 AM EDT reply actions  

Namoli would probably cut or trade Percival because of cost-control reasons

WIN WIN!

"Where we all wait in earnest with pudding in hand for the Upton comet to sail through the roofed skies, so that we may meet Him."

by kericr on May 14, 2009 10:25 AM EDT up reply actions  

What's absolutely positively worse than Perci

is Navarro rubbing snot all over his jersey and batting glove while in the batters box, hitting a sac fly (WTG fat boy) and coming in and high fiving everyone with a booger laden batters glove.

by ConnorManning on May 14, 2009 10:35 AM EDT reply actions  

Kevin Stocker
the Hit Show
Late Night with Jimmy Fallon
all night document reviews
going to the dmv
the economy

by Devil Ray on May 14, 2009 5:30 PM EDT reply actions  

how the shit did they get the Roots to do that gawdawful show?

Do what you love to do and give it your very best. Whether it's business or baseball, or the theater, or any field. If you don't love what you're doing and you can't give it your best, get out of it. Life is too short. You'll be an old man before you know it.

-Al Lopez

by Sandy Kazmir on May 14, 2009 6:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

I would rather watch Toby Hall and Navi makeout

then watch Fat Ass pitch. They could even be naked and I wouldnt change my answer

by BJ the Bossman on May 15, 2009 2:05 PM EDT reply actions  

Swine flu is a myth, Percy is very real and scary

Do what you love to do and give it your very best. Whether it's business or baseball, or the theater, or any field. If you don't love what you're doing and you can't give it your best, get out of it. Life is too short. You'll be an old man before you know it.

-Al Lopez

by Sandy Kazmir on May 15, 2009 2:19 PM EDT up reply actions  

1) playing the decisive game of the world series, stopping the game when your team gains momentum, then starting it again 2 days later.
2) losing the world series in 3.5 innings.
3) reopening the worst sports memory wound of my life in attempt to make a funny post.

by tropbeachbum on May 15, 2009 4:19 PM EDT reply actions  

Things that are way way better than Troy Percival

1) At the time, when you least expect it B.J upton gets a clutch home run

"Yeah, I am not the old annoying guy next door. Heck, I don't even know who i am"

by 4QB on May 15, 2009 11:11 PM EDT reply actions  

Do you really feel that way?

I saw Percy fight off 20 fouls to get an out last year…… Call me Homer, but I think 3.5 back is a pretty good place to be with Shieldsie being Shieldsie, Garza being Garza, Sonny regaining Sonny, The Big Ugly giving up one and the Velociraptor bearing teeth. I washed my hat for the first time in a year today……

by Chianski on May 24, 2009 12:18 AM EDT reply actions  

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