Here is an approximation of how fast and furious the 2013 Minnesota Twins are, where
"You need to call somebody! ... No, 9-1-1 is not going to help... It's going into their house."
Who do you call when 9-1-1 won't help? That's a scary question -- if it hadn't already been answered some eons ago by the generations that walked these tepid ice paths before us: