So a while back I was sitting around doing nothing when my phone vibrated - I have this annoying habit of setting my ringtones to songs I, and most of the hearing-able population detest, simply for comedic effect, but after a while it loses its shine, especially when I forgot to turn it off in class - and it was a text from an old friend. I don't mean literally old, just figuratively. He's nearly three years older than me and he goes to college in Alabama, so I barely see him or talk to him anymore.
Hey man can u pick me up at airport in four hours?
To which I reply, sure, albeit begrudgingly. So after making sure I had the right airport and timing it for delays - meaning I left my home about four and a half hours later - I arrive and go in search of him. He's not replying to any of my texts or attempts to call him, which is annoying and leads me to believe the plane has yet to land. One more trip around, I tell myself, and I'm leaving.
I turn the corner and there he is. "Hey man, they lost my luggage, couldn't call you."
"Why didn't you use a payphone?"
"Ha, man I don't carry cash on me."
We made small talk as we headed towards my car, I told him about the writing thing, and somehow he hadn't heard of me, which as you can imagine, shook my fragile ego. "So you write about baseball, huh?"
"Yep, mostly Rays."
"Huh, you know I got into baseball last semester. Had a roomie who was a big fan."
"Oh yeah?" I said while pulling the keys from my pocket.
"Yeah, I've even got a team."
"Nice. Let me guess, the Biscuits?"
"Who?"
"The minor league affiliate...for the Rays."
"No man, I mean the majors."
"Oh, so the Braves?"
"Uh, the Red Sox."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah bro, even bought a jersey for that Pawdroyer guy."
We were at my car when I decided I couldn't knowingly support this. I bypassed the automatic locks and unlocked my door, getting in quickly and starting the engine. "Hey man you gonna unlock my door or what?"
I put the car in reverse and began to back out amidst his pleas while trying out my Soulja Boy ringtone and taking in the desecration of our culture the only way I know how.