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Rays 6, Mariners 7: Tampa Bay's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

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The offense manages to keep the game close despite a shaky bullpen in Bizarro World

stretch, dammit!
stretch, dammit!
Kim Klement-USA TODAY Sports

Barebones recap tonight, gentleman (and ladies). I was caught in the middle of one of the biggest storm cells that I can remember, and my power went out for like an hour. I swear it did. This is not an elaborate ruse to cover up the fact that I did not watch the game. I did, when I could. I wish I hadn't though. My power came on right before McGee gave up the game. I didn't even get to watch the hockey game either! It was awful! The whole thing was awful! This was a garbage game. A garbage day for Tampa Bay sports. I'm upset.

Alex Colome did his best Nathan Karns impression, and put the Rays in a big ol' hole early on. Austin Jackson led off with a hit, and while stealing second, managed to slip into third on the backs of a poor throw by Rene Rivera. Seth Smith singled him home, and Cano also made it on base, giving the M's three straight singles to start the game. Kyle Seager singled, scoring a run, and despite an ill-fated challenge by Kevin Cash, Cano managed to sneak into second base. Only on the backs of a Welington Casillo double play was Colome able to escape without any more damage.

And...that was about all Colome would allow. Despite the 38 pitch inning, Colome managed to pitch into the sixth inning, ending up with a pitch count of only 94. Cash has been stingy with Colome and today was no different. If he'd pitched a perfect game through six Cash probably would've called for the Three-Headed Monster to close out the game. Although it wasn't a perfecto, Colome only allowed two more Mariners to reach base after that arduous first inning. So all in all a pretty good thing.

The Rays answered back pretty quickly in the bottom of the inning. Joey Butler doubled with one out, and Logan Forsythe got hit by a pitch. Beckham somehow managed to draw a walk on 7 pitches, and all of a sudden the Rays had the bases loaded with two outs. If it were last night, the moment would have came and went. Jake Elmore didn't see it that way, and he lined a single to right to tie the game at 2-2.

In the third, Jake Elmore played the hero again, scoring Tim Beckham on a double. It was pretty nice, and it gave the Rays the lead which was awesome for a while. Jake Elmore has had some clutch hits. I am a fan of Jake Elmore.

But none of that really matters because of the crappy eighth inning. Jake McGee allowed two singles to start the inning, but it was about to not matter because he coaxed a double-play ball from Nelson Cruz, the best hitter in the AL at the moment. Except it didn't happen. Nick Franklin, perhaps distracted by a shiny object, booted the tailor-made ball, putting men on every base. Literally one pitch later, Kyle Seager hit a grand slam. It got so quiet that inning you could hear one guy from the second deck shouting at Chris Taylor. That's all she wrote.

Really, that's all.

Stop reading.

Ugh, fine. There was more.

The Rays made a serious bid for a comeback in the ninth inning, even coming inches within victory. Leadoff singles and a hit batsman by the always entertaining Fernando Rodney loaded the bases with no outs. Evan Longoria, with two strikes, lifted a ball to left that seemed to just keep carrying and carrying. It bounced right off the top of the yellow metal pole, skipping away from the left fielder scoring two. Forysthe fouled out, and Jake Elmore, he of the 3 RBI was coaxed into a game-ending double-play ball. Except it didn't happen. Robinson Cano, perhaps distracted by a shiny object, spiked the tailor-made ball on the throw to first, drawing the first baseman off of the bag and allowing the tying run to score.

The inning ended with the game once again tied, with ace reliever Brad Boxberger scheduled to enter. Surely this would mean great things for the Rays.

Unfortunately it did not. Brad Boxberger, perhaps distracted by a shiny object, threw a fat 0-2 fastball to Kyle Seager. Kiermaier made a bid to rob him of a homer, but it was not meant to be. #RaysDown 7-6, and that's how the game would end.

I'm done recapping this game. It sucked. Plus I'm tired and my A/C is broken from the power surge or whatever. Tomorrow the Rays have to face Felix Hernandez to avoid a home sweep and a 5 game losing streak. I'm sure that they will be able to manhandle this pitcher who has a history of imperfection against the Rays.