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Rays 6, Angels 5: Everything is terrible forever, until it isn't

Unaided by the Mariners, the Rays make their own luck.

yaaa whatever man
yaaa whatever man
Richard Mackson-USA TODAY Sports

The Lightning lost because they allowed two late goals in less than 2 minutes. This game ended around 1 AM. I woke up at 6 AM to drive to Tropicana Field to go to my younger brother's high school graduation (where I had to pay $10...bummer.) I'm tired and upset.

As a result, this recap tonight will be the barebones of what you need to know about tonight's (or, by the time you're reading this, last night's) game. Rest assured if you read this article, you will leave having at least heard of baseball in a general sense. You could even likely talk to your friends at work a little bit about the game, if they weren't too busy chatting about muscle cars. I'm looking at you, Shannon.

The Rays could've scored in the first but didn't. Can you believe it? It seems so out-of-character but it happened. Guyer and Butler singled and both stole bases, putting a runner on third with one out. Uh oh. Logan Forsythe struck out, and Jake Elmore harmlessly flew out to end the threat.

Then Mike Trout hit a home run. I'm so sick of that guy. 1-0 Angles Angels

In the third Karns ran into more trouble thanks to that other guy not named Mike Trout. Kirk Niemannhouse doubled off the wall on a ball that Kiermaier would have caught in his sleep. Karns walked Erick Aybar, and bad things began to happen:

Trout actually grounded out, but that guy behind him is actually pretty good. Pujols singled hard to left to give the Angels a 2-0 lead. Why not, right? Karns walked Kole Calhoun and it looked like the wheels were coming off early but they somehow didn't. He got a groundout to end an inning that could have been a lot worse, but also wouldn't have been a problem had KK been in center all along.

One inning later Karns did two more bad things: he (1) allowed a hit to Worst Player in Baseball (TM) Matt Joyce (which skipped just over the glove of the vertically leaping Longoria, and (2) allowed a two-run homer to Johnny Giavotella, who looks like he just finished playing Pop Warner football in the dirt field behind the schoolhouse. 4-0 Angels, but at this point it feels like 69-0. They're never coming back from this.

The Rays came back from it in the sixth. After not having gotten a hit since the first, Guyer reached on a HBP, and Joey Butler lined one to center, over the fence! And it kept carrying! And it was a home run! For points! And the Rays weren't done! More exclamation points!

Longo singles up the middle and Frosty walked on four straight pitches. Were the wheels coming off for Hector Santiago?

Yeah. Steven Souza, who struck out looking on a ball low and inside in his previous atbat, made an adjustment. He swung, and lifted the ball really really high, scraping over the left field wall and giving the Rays the lead! The first five batters reached base this inning, and all five crossed home plate. #RaysUp 5-4

Cash called to Brandon Gomes, ending Karns' night. He was unavailable to avoid the home run bug against the Angels, but then again, neither have any of the Rays. Even Archer gave up a homer to Pujols in a historic performance last night. Gomes allowed a leadoff ground-rule double to David Freese, but thanks to strikeout heroics from Matt Joyce and a helluva play by Cabby (wherein he stopped a groundball from reaching the outfield, and also threw out Freese at home in the same play) nothing happened. There would be no "Did Cash pull the SP too early?" discussions tonight!

Jake McGee worked a perfect seventh, STRIKING OUT MIKE TROUT ON A 98 MPH FASTBALL.

Things got dicey in the eighth. Jepsen allowed a single to Pujols that snuck through the shift, and a single to Kole Calhoun that also just skipped past the defense. Pujols, taking advantage of the wild arm of Souza, advanced to third base. Souza pulled Longo off the bag, and Calhoun got stars in his eyes. He tried to reach second, and made it, but overslid the bag. Cabrera had the tag applied all the way, and got him for the first out. Jepsen then struck out David Freese on an 86 mph changeup no one was expecting. Cash called to Brad Boxberger to collect the final out, and struck out ol' MOM to close out the inning.

Of course, as we all know, nothing comes easy this year. Boxxxy allowed a blooper of a hit to lead off the inning, but Rene Rivera once again showed off his arm and caught the pinch runner stealing. Boxberger then proceeded to walk and allow another hit, putting runners on the corners. Erick Aybar flew out deep to right, and the Angels tied it up 5-5.

These are not the kinds of games this team can blow away. The offense simply doesn't have power to come back multiple ti-

oh wow thanks marc

Ol' Blue Eyes launched a no-doubter to right and I left up and screamed, waking my baby sister. Sorry.

Cedeno got Kole Calhoun to fly out, and Geltz finished the game off. Rays win 6-5, somehow.

The Rays got hits in only three innings, and were retired in order in six of the ten. The Angels reached base in eight of the ten innings. But those stats don't matter. Not right now, anyway.

Roll Call Info
Total comments 340
Total commenters 23
Commenter list Adam Sanford, AndrewTorrez, Ben Tumbling, Brett Phillips, Brian Andersbot, Brickhaus, DFAHowell, Daniel Kishi, JRTW612, MrWizzle21, Noles95', Pocoroba, Rays1118, RazeTheRoof, kapaafire, killa3312, lizzieray, magicrays, nomo.red.evil, the dobber, thedudeofdudes, turntwo21, youcancallmeRayRay
Story URLs

# Recs Commenter Comment Link
5 Adam Sanford Rays tie it this inning, calling it
4 Brett Phillips Caught John Jaso disease
4 Brett Phillips Gotta catch up to Boston
3 Brian Andersbot Joey Buts is a GD MAN
3 thedudeofdudes I'm calling a Souza HR tonight.
3 Adam Sanford Butler is doing a pretty good job of it
2 Pocoroba Archer?
2 AndrewTorrez it doesn't matter, the Rays have only a 13% chance of making the playoffs now
2 Brett Phillips Literally the most offensive thing that's been said to me.
1 MrWizzle21 I KNEW IT!
1 the dobber I kind of hope the Lightning get swept, would be a whole 8 months before I heard about hockey again.
1 thedudeofdudes Oversliding bases Champions banner?
1 Brian Andersbot You're crazy if you don't see the good in Jepsen. He's our 7th inning guy. You're spoiled if you want better than him.
1 Noles95' I prefer geltz vs joyce than cedeno vs freese
1 AndrewTorrez especially hurts after stranding 900 runners in the first
1 AndrewTorrez welp
1 Brett Phillips 98 MOTHER FUCKER, MCGEE IS FUCKING BAAAAAAAAAAACK
1 Brett Phillips Holyshit
1 Brett Phillips I'm taking my talents to Lookout Landing
1 Adam Sanford Just noting,
1 Brian Andersbot Grew up with parents.
1 Adam Sanford So has the strikezone just been awful this entire series?
1 MrWizzle21 You can use hashtag humblebrag