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Baseball People who are, surprisingly, not the same people

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Wait...he doesn’t play for the Brewers?

Tampa Bay Rays v Baltimore Orioles Photo by Matt Hazlett/Getty Images

We all have those moments. Like when you have a long conversation about Jed Lowrie, only to realize you’ve confused him with Brett Lawrie. It happens to the best of us. Bill Mueller and Kevin Millar. The Y-Chases (Whitley, Utley, Headley). Heck, if you’ve been around long enough, you’ve probably been doing it since Ralph Kiner wasn’t Al Kaline no matter how often you thought he was.

But who are the worst in the game right now? On a lazy off day after a frustrating loss, these are our nominations:

Peter Bourjos and Jason Bourgeois

Until the Rays signed Boojit this year, this one got me every dang time. But they’re actually pretty easy to tell apart. I mean, check out the ears on Peter.

Peter...

MLB: New York Yankees at Tampa Bay Rays Kim Klement-USA TODAY Sports

Jason...

MLB: Arizona Diamondbacks-Spring Training Media Day Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports

Easy peasy.

Jason Bourgeois and Jason Bourne

This one is tougher. See, Jason Bourgeois is a real person. Jason Bourne, on the other hand, is a fictional character created by Robert Ludlum and currently played in the movies by Matt Damon. Who is apparently not Ben Affleck.

Premiere Of Universal Pictures' 'Jason Bourne' In Las Vegas Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images

Jason Bourne and Justin Bour

Meanwhile, Justin Bour is a character for the fictional baseball team that moved to Miami after the Major League III.

Miami Marlins v Colorado Rockies Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty Images

Steve Geltz and Steve Jeltz

I blame the jiff/giff guy for the confusion on this one.

The soft-g guy is the bad pitcher from the current era:

Tampa Bay Rays v Seattle Mariners Photo by Otto Greule Jr/Getty Images

The hard-j fella was an awful hitter with 80-grade jheri curls in the 80s & 90s.

Steve Jeltz Photo by: Rick Stewart /Getty Images

Kyle Kendrick and Kyle Hendricks

Actually, I’m not convinced these two aren’t the same guy. Maybe mediocre Kyle-with-a-K did a name change to spark a luck change, like B.J. switching to Melvin, only this time it actually worked and he experienced a remarkable mid-career resurgence? I mean, can you think of a better reason Kyle-with-an-H is any good? Have they even been in the same stadium at the same time?

And just look at the way they wear their dejection:

Arizona Diamondbacks v Colorado Rockies Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty Images
Chicago Cubs v Chicago White Sox Photo by Jon Durr/Getty Images

I mean, just look at them!!! They’re practically twins!

Carlos Gomez and Carlos Gonzalez

Maybe you don’t get the players themselves mixed up, but admit it: you’re never sure which one somebody is talking about when they drop CarGo into a conversation.

CarGo...

MLB: Colorado Rockies at Milwaukee Brewers Benny Sieu-USA TODAY Sports

CarWon’t.

Milwaukee Brewers v Pittsburgh Pirates Photo by Justin K. Aller/Getty Images

How about you? Any guys you’re always getting mixed up?